So interesting! I have been off FB for years - very bad for my mental health, I dip in and out of Instagram but find the scroll so much like a vortex it scares me. Substack is feeling just right for now, glad you are enjoying it too!
Same here! I deleted my Facebook page back in July. I had been threatening to do it for YEARS!!! I felt relief and I don’t miss it. I haven’t been on Instagram since the 16th July and I feel better for it. I’ve read more books, gone to bed earlier, taken more walks, written more. Substack is such a lovely place to hang out. It feels more ‘grown up’ and maybe I am too!
Yea that is next level. I keep thinking I’ll do that but then I have so many photos of my kids on there from when they were young, and I haven’t saved every single one of them hmmmm
Thank you so much for this. I have walked away from most social media years ago - save for my YouTube channel which feels less oppressive than Instagram, Facebook etc. I finally began my Substack last October…after having opened the account a year before and leaving it untouched.
I really struggle….even on here… in engaging in the way that seems to come so naturally and easily for others. Even the message counter and emails overwhelm me at this point. I love writing and sharing, and organically reading that which I’m drawn to.
However, I’m a complex trauma survivor, and writing daily is my both my gift to the world and my therapy. Sometimes it’s truly hard for me to read outside of what I produce, and I feel so much pressure at times from the dictates of how to properly “grow” a Substack.
So, thank you for affirming what I’ve felt intuitively and have been mostly following, but with reticence.
I’m so glad you had that time away for reflection, and that you were able to spend those last days with your dog fully present. My love to you, your family and your precious ninja cat 😻😹
Thank you so much for sharing this. I fully appreciate how much writing is a healing experience and a gift (for me too - partly why I have spent so much time and put so much thought into my paid tier on here which will be about creativity as healing). I have needed to invite writing more officially into my therapeutic work, which is why so often I find myself talking about my own process.
I also struggle on here to know what to do because I want to let people know my Substack exists, but I don’t want to get into the same toxic habits I had on other platforms where I felt obligated to constantly engage and follow others. Fortunately I am finding my way and feeling a little bit more natural in what I am drawn to and reading. I do love your publication! it always feels so relevant to me.
It’s all part of a larger process for me actually of being okay in the silences between, which is when we normally want to fill a space, and where social media often comes into the equation.
Thank you so much for this! My intuition nudged me to delete my business Facebook and instagram accounts in June 2023 and it was amazing!
Since Feb this year I have been off my personal Facebook and Instagram.
I am currently looking to also shift my relationship with my cell phone. I tried to totally walk away and go back to a landline… but that only lasted a few days. But I did find it so helpful.
Desiring to do it again. Hopefully for longer! As it felt good to talk to someone on the phone instead of through text. I loved how much more intentional it is to pick up the phone to call someone. Thank you again for this post 🙏🏻💕
That’s so great to hear, that you are navigating this shift successfully. I think the more who do, the more our options shift. I often wonder how long social media will last in the human experience. I think one day we will look back and see how crazy it was.
I'm also looking at reclaiming my attention and eyesight with a minimalist phone, and a large tablet for productivity and online consumption. I LOVE having a chin wag over the phone, not even facetime, and am.so lucky to have a few quality kin in my life to get to do that with regularly.
For the past almost 2 years, I’ve stopped having an online presence. My only post on Instagram/FB was probably sharing my baby at the first year mark.
I honestly couldn’t get how people could take just great pics of them and their kids, while I was so deep in the thick of it. Just trying to make sense of it all. Early motherhood.
Looking back now, I’ll tell myself, I was there. I didn’t escape into social media though I numbed/coped/survived by watching shows! My beloved greys anatomy and then a Korean show. I was so aware that I was avoiding my body and my emotions that I just had to stop. Yes, almost like exchanging one addiction for another.
I’ve logged out of FB and only ever returned 1-2 times. I’ve recently logged out of Instagram and I feel a relief.
I realised there’s been some comparison going on. Though I mostly save posts on kids, emotional regulation and marriage. Am I even going to refer to them? Part of me doubts.
I’ve loved being out of social media. It helped me simply allocate my resources to work and to my little family and my self. That feels full and enough for me.
Logging out of Instagram was the bigger one for me. A relief and relaxation over my shoulders. I’d be curious too, to spend more time reflecting on my experiences since then.
Partly I am putting aside a dream to do work that I love online like women’s circles and coaching sessions. Yet I continue to hold weekly singing lessons for a single student who has been with me for almost 9 years. That’s quite something.
I’ve learnt that I don’t need an online business - for now. I’m in circle with myself, with my son, my family, all that I interact and come in contact with.
This is the time for me to tend to myself… rediscover my new identity and recommit to taking care of myself and what works best for me now. I’m getting some sense and rhythm of it now. Thanks for this space. This got kind of long and a self reflection!
Sep 19·edited Sep 19Liked by Michelle Dixon, Ph.D.
There is so much I could say to this - basically, I agree with the sentiments you shared, and I'm going to be writing more about social media soon. But I have lots of neurodivergent-related topics on my brain to write about first 😄 In the meantime you might enjoy this post of mine, 'Savour': https://neurodivergentnotes.substack.com/p/savour
I’m so glad to read this, Michelle 🙏🏼 I’ve just chosen to detox from FB and IG (well, 3 weeks ago) as I was preparing to go on a week’s silent retreat. It must have taken you much willpower and courage to jump out entirely and you have motivated me to stay strong. I also feel that life will bring to you what you need when you need it. ✨🙏🏼🕊️
Love this. I am in almost the same mindspace as you were (perimenopausal) and have been on a social media break since July of this year. Substack has been refreshing, even though I only read and don’t write much. Still re-finding myself. Glad to have found this post!
I have taken two very long breaks and go back and forth between taking everything off my phone and then going back to it. It is absolutely connected to my mental health.
Yes me too. I go on Facebook every once in while to check in on what my friends doing, and sometimes found I’ve missed events because I’m not on there. But then I also find that I’m triggered pretty quickly on there and I realise why I’m not on it.
I love this reflection, and sometimes we need to write it down in order to really understand why we’ve done something and what the benefits or drawbacks have been. It sounds like you made the right decision for yourself and your family. I love Substack because it’s a great community, but I also need to put some boundaries around it so I’m not on it too much, but when I do I find that it feeds me rather than drains me. I’m so glad you’re here!
I understand completely what you are saying about not knowing who you are without your online persona. I also love what you write about repulsion and attraction. I’ve been repulsed by my biz but was too scared to let it go. I’d also spent 10 years building it up and didn’t want to say goodbye. A love/hate relationship if you will. It was build from survival mode and not sustainable. I was burnt out. Then there was no money left. The Universe made me sit up and pay attention. I got three part-time jobs - dogsitting, working in a gift shop and supporting students with learning difficulties at my local college. I am back in the real world again and happier than I ever was online. I am not on FB. I’ve stopped using Instagram. I love YouTube. I learn so much on there but I find that the shorts are a sneaky way to satisfy my addiction and distract myself from myself. I am attracted to reading more books and I enjoy hanging out here on Substack. As I wrote on another comment here, it feels more grown up. Lovely to meet you and read about your experience.
Wonder article M.D. Ph.D, I offer online classes on shoe tie methods for optimal performance. In the USA shoestrings are essential for many things especially online interaction.
Welcome to the dog and pony show. Don’t forget to Vote.
I left all social media a while back and I'm glad I did. Creativity is up, I have more time! I don't miss it one jot, or the toxicity of certain elements of it.
So interesting! I have been off FB for years - very bad for my mental health, I dip in and out of Instagram but find the scroll so much like a vortex it scares me. Substack is feeling just right for now, glad you are enjoying it too!
Vortex is a good word for it 😂
Same here! I deleted my Facebook page back in July. I had been threatening to do it for YEARS!!! I felt relief and I don’t miss it. I haven’t been on Instagram since the 16th July and I feel better for it. I’ve read more books, gone to bed earlier, taken more walks, written more. Substack is such a lovely place to hang out. It feels more ‘grown up’ and maybe I am too!
Wonderful Lisa! That is a new level - deleting your FB page, weirdly I've never thought of that, but if I am never there why shouldn't I!?!
Yea that is next level. I keep thinking I’ll do that but then I have so many photos of my kids on there from when they were young, and I haven’t saved every single one of them hmmmm
Thank you so much for this. I have walked away from most social media years ago - save for my YouTube channel which feels less oppressive than Instagram, Facebook etc. I finally began my Substack last October…after having opened the account a year before and leaving it untouched.
I really struggle….even on here… in engaging in the way that seems to come so naturally and easily for others. Even the message counter and emails overwhelm me at this point. I love writing and sharing, and organically reading that which I’m drawn to.
However, I’m a complex trauma survivor, and writing daily is my both my gift to the world and my therapy. Sometimes it’s truly hard for me to read outside of what I produce, and I feel so much pressure at times from the dictates of how to properly “grow” a Substack.
So, thank you for affirming what I’ve felt intuitively and have been mostly following, but with reticence.
I’m so glad you had that time away for reflection, and that you were able to spend those last days with your dog fully present. My love to you, your family and your precious ninja cat 😻😹
Thank you so much for sharing this. I fully appreciate how much writing is a healing experience and a gift (for me too - partly why I have spent so much time and put so much thought into my paid tier on here which will be about creativity as healing). I have needed to invite writing more officially into my therapeutic work, which is why so often I find myself talking about my own process.
I also struggle on here to know what to do because I want to let people know my Substack exists, but I don’t want to get into the same toxic habits I had on other platforms where I felt obligated to constantly engage and follow others. Fortunately I am finding my way and feeling a little bit more natural in what I am drawn to and reading. I do love your publication! it always feels so relevant to me.
It’s all part of a larger process for me actually of being okay in the silences between, which is when we normally want to fill a space, and where social media often comes into the equation.
❤️🙏🏻
Thank you so much for this! My intuition nudged me to delete my business Facebook and instagram accounts in June 2023 and it was amazing!
Since Feb this year I have been off my personal Facebook and Instagram.
I am currently looking to also shift my relationship with my cell phone. I tried to totally walk away and go back to a landline… but that only lasted a few days. But I did find it so helpful.
Desiring to do it again. Hopefully for longer! As it felt good to talk to someone on the phone instead of through text. I loved how much more intentional it is to pick up the phone to call someone. Thank you again for this post 🙏🏻💕
That’s so great to hear, that you are navigating this shift successfully. I think the more who do, the more our options shift. I often wonder how long social media will last in the human experience. I think one day we will look back and see how crazy it was.
Love that perspective! I do know more people are opting out! I think you could be right we will look back and wonder why!
I'm also looking at reclaiming my attention and eyesight with a minimalist phone, and a large tablet for productivity and online consumption. I LOVE having a chin wag over the phone, not even facetime, and am.so lucky to have a few quality kin in my life to get to do that with regularly.
For the past almost 2 years, I’ve stopped having an online presence. My only post on Instagram/FB was probably sharing my baby at the first year mark.
I honestly couldn’t get how people could take just great pics of them and their kids, while I was so deep in the thick of it. Just trying to make sense of it all. Early motherhood.
Looking back now, I’ll tell myself, I was there. I didn’t escape into social media though I numbed/coped/survived by watching shows! My beloved greys anatomy and then a Korean show. I was so aware that I was avoiding my body and my emotions that I just had to stop. Yes, almost like exchanging one addiction for another.
I’ve logged out of FB and only ever returned 1-2 times. I’ve recently logged out of Instagram and I feel a relief.
I realised there’s been some comparison going on. Though I mostly save posts on kids, emotional regulation and marriage. Am I even going to refer to them? Part of me doubts.
I’ve loved being out of social media. It helped me simply allocate my resources to work and to my little family and my self. That feels full and enough for me.
Logging out of Instagram was the bigger one for me. A relief and relaxation over my shoulders. I’d be curious too, to spend more time reflecting on my experiences since then.
Partly I am putting aside a dream to do work that I love online like women’s circles and coaching sessions. Yet I continue to hold weekly singing lessons for a single student who has been with me for almost 9 years. That’s quite something.
I’ve learnt that I don’t need an online business - for now. I’m in circle with myself, with my son, my family, all that I interact and come in contact with.
This is the time for me to tend to myself… rediscover my new identity and recommit to taking care of myself and what works best for me now. I’m getting some sense and rhythm of it now. Thanks for this space. This got kind of long and a self reflection!
There is so much I could say to this - basically, I agree with the sentiments you shared, and I'm going to be writing more about social media soon. But I have lots of neurodivergent-related topics on my brain to write about first 😄 In the meantime you might enjoy this post of mine, 'Savour': https://neurodivergentnotes.substack.com/p/savour
I look forward to reading you!
I’m so glad to read this, Michelle 🙏🏼 I’ve just chosen to detox from FB and IG (well, 3 weeks ago) as I was preparing to go on a week’s silent retreat. It must have taken you much willpower and courage to jump out entirely and you have motivated me to stay strong. I also feel that life will bring to you what you need when you need it. ✨🙏🏼🕊️
Thank you! I hope you have or have had a wonderful silent retreat 🙏🏻
I did, thanks, although it was hard not being allowed to read and write. A deeply profound experience 😇🙏🏼😊
Love this. I am in almost the same mindspace as you were (perimenopausal) and have been on a social media break since July of this year. Substack has been refreshing, even though I only read and don’t write much. Still re-finding myself. Glad to have found this post!
Glad you found it too! Would to know your experience of your social media break too!
I'm feeling this so much! I am in the same stage of life. So much food for though in your article
Thank you Jane 🙏🏻
I have taken two very long breaks and go back and forth between taking everything off my phone and then going back to it. It is absolutely connected to my mental health.
Yes me too. I go on Facebook every once in while to check in on what my friends doing, and sometimes found I’ve missed events because I’m not on there. But then I also find that I’m triggered pretty quickly on there and I realise why I’m not on it.
“because my line of work has been healing, I had become used to offering support to those in emotional pain all the time, with every online comment.”
Thank you 🙏🏽
❤️❤️
This is such a useful post I'm gonna reatack it. Love your work, Michelle. 👍
Thank you so much ☺️ and I am loving your poetry!
I love this reflection, and sometimes we need to write it down in order to really understand why we’ve done something and what the benefits or drawbacks have been. It sounds like you made the right decision for yourself and your family. I love Substack because it’s a great community, but I also need to put some boundaries around it so I’m not on it too much, but when I do I find that it feeds me rather than drains me. I’m so glad you’re here!
I understand completely what you are saying about not knowing who you are without your online persona. I also love what you write about repulsion and attraction. I’ve been repulsed by my biz but was too scared to let it go. I’d also spent 10 years building it up and didn’t want to say goodbye. A love/hate relationship if you will. It was build from survival mode and not sustainable. I was burnt out. Then there was no money left. The Universe made me sit up and pay attention. I got three part-time jobs - dogsitting, working in a gift shop and supporting students with learning difficulties at my local college. I am back in the real world again and happier than I ever was online. I am not on FB. I’ve stopped using Instagram. I love YouTube. I learn so much on there but I find that the shorts are a sneaky way to satisfy my addiction and distract myself from myself. I am attracted to reading more books and I enjoy hanging out here on Substack. As I wrote on another comment here, it feels more grown up. Lovely to meet you and read about your experience.
Wonder article M.D. Ph.D, I offer online classes on shoe tie methods for optimal performance. In the USA shoestrings are essential for many things especially online interaction.
Welcome to the dog and pony show. Don’t forget to Vote.
So much of this resonates! The state of life, adult children, feeling trapped into posting to prove something. A great read. Thank you. 💫
Thank you Trudi I’m so glad 😌🙏🏻
I left all social media a while back and I'm glad I did. Creativity is up, I have more time! I don't miss it one jot, or the toxicity of certain elements of it.