Creative self-inquiry for healing (1/4)

Soul Lines ~ introduction my self-inquiry series

This is self-inquiry for creatives who long to heal, deepen their spiritual connection, and explore their art.

The soul purpose of this series (yes, the sole purpose) is to facilitate your healing and deepening into greater alignment with your Wholeness.

Soul Lines is a trauma-informed process to deepen your own healing/awakening journey that can be done in your own time.

It also just might lay the foundation for your memoir, your next business idea, or the evolution of your personal artwork (no matter the form), or your Substack.

What are Soul Lines?

Soul lines represent your UNIQUE path to healing and Wholeness (see image of human with purple line). Your lines (made from the mix in the cement mixer) are made from: all that you have experienced, your story + the emotions/wounds that are there, + your unique way of working with them so that you can let in the light.

Examples: For one person, the path to Wholeness might be through the Victim, using writing and contemplation to see it, honour it, and find a way to Trust. For another, it might be via a potent inner anger, which through drawing or poetry uncovers new ways of acceptance and allowing, shifting into peace.

There are countless paths, because we are all so unique.

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Self-Inquiry for Creatives

Periodically I will offer a theme that I invite you to contemplate and work with creatively: journalling, voice memo-ing, drawing, meditating with, even moving with, or singing, or slam poetry (whatever arises). I present the theme as a series of questions, some thoughts to take you deeper, and give you resources to deepen the self-inquiry.

We are doing what Thích Nhất Hanh describes in his book Fear:

Concentration has the power to burn away afflictions, just like the sunlight focused by a lens can burn a piece of paper underneath. In the same way, concentration — looking deeply into our fear, anger, delusion, and despair — can burn them away, leaving insight.

The first theme is memory.

Memory: Remembering and Forgetting

Memory is a slippery beast. It’s unclear how well we remember or the extent to which what we think are memories are true. The false memory syndrome is actually a thing; one study showed that 30% of tested subjects had false autobiographical memories. People think they remember something only to discover that their ‘memory’ was a creative merging of data points observed at the time; or else, the ‘memory’ is the adoption of someone else’s story (the common example is thinking you remember an incident in childhood that has been recounted to you so many times that you make it your own).

The issue of how traumatic experiences are remembered is one of the most contested areas in psychology. An especially controversial aspect of this is the topic of repressed memories. Repressed memory is the idea that traumatic experiences – such as sexual abuse – can be unconsciously blocked for many years such that the individual does not know they were abused, and later recovered in pristine form. The issue of repressed memories has become especially pervasive during the so-called “memory wars”; the ongoing debate between those (often memory scholars) asserting that there is no credible scientific evidence that repressed memories exist and others (often clinicians) claiming that repressed memories do exist. Many scholars have assumed that this debate has been settled, but there is evidence that this debate is far from over (Otgaar et al., Citation2019). From the abstract here.

So many of my clients arrive with a deep thirst to remember the truth of what happened.

Once I did regression to (cautiously and slowly) uncover an abuse memory my client thought she had which would have implicated a close family member. Instead, we arrived at medical trauma. She had undergone treatment in hospital for eczema as a very young child and at one point, naked, was asked to spread her legs so nurses could apply ointment.

Was her memory faulty? Or was how she projected blame onto an individual faulty? Is the memory itself more important or the lesson learned—the story that was being told because of it? In this case, the client experienced a residual feeling of shame - and that was entirely valid, and became the focus of subsequent sessions.

Some clients come to forget the truth of what happened — to let it go, somehow, so that it no longer tortures them.

It is said that one’s sense of self is all about memories - that we are, in fact, only a collection of memories about our pasts.

There is a transformation on offer when we dip down into how memory defines us. How are we creating our ego identity? Where is there room for change? For a reconception of self?

Is who we were who we still are, and how has that changed?

In my next members only post, I will be asking some juicy questions to get you started with journalling.

Contribute to a community in the Chat for paid members

When you join this paid tier, you have a chance to chat about this in our private Substack chat. Of course it’s up to you if you post your reflections in the comments, too! I would LOVE LOVE to see what emerges - drawings, songs, poems, essays, journal entries. But only if that feels good for you!

To be witnessed in vulnerability is healing. To be seen in creative expression is also healing!

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My paid tier allows you to contribute to the private chat and also attend periodic group Zoom calls to discuss, hold space, and be with each other. I will start to hold group calls when I have more paid members. The annual fee of $70 is 30% off the month to month price of $8. If you are struggling financially, and really want to participate, I trust that your intention is honourable and I can waive this fee, so please do email me directly: support@michelle-dixon.com